I should start off by pointing out that I Hate Michael Bay. Everything he has done has been terrible, his scenes are nothing more then set ups for the next big CGI filled explosion. The man knows nothing about character development, as the actors are equal props in his movies. That being said I went into this movie hoping to give it an equal chance to prove me wrong. What ended up happening is everything I thought it was going to be and less.
Plot: 1/10
The Plot from what I can gather is about the previous leader of the Autobots returning and revealing that he is actually working for the Decepticons. This leads to Sentinel Prime unleashing a technology that would help bring their home planet of Cybertron to Earth, enslaving humans to the robots and using our resources to rebuild the now barren planet. In a well done movie this plot actually seems like something worth checking out but here its really just becomes another subplot in a movie full of useless and boring subplots like; Sam looking for a new job or Sam jealous of his girlfriends rich and handsome boss, Sam feeling like despite the fact that he has saved the world he is a nobody. Also the whole time I am watching this movie I am thinking to myself dear lord didn't we just see this play out in the last two movies. Michael Bay has no idea on how to set up a scene and it really shows
Characters: 2/10
Don't let that 2 fool you there were absolutely no characters in this film trust me. Sam Witwicky played blandly by the equally bland and hopefully soon to be forgettable Shia LeBeouf is whinny and and the straight face expressions on his face are there the entire movie, when he is not yelling for Optimus. His new girlfriend who has a name but for the moment lets call her Not-Megan Fox cause that's what she is. That's not to say that Megan Fox is a good actress because she is not but I never thought I would watch a movie and be wishing for a Megan Fox performance. The US government is apparently run by morons cause they think that they can control alien lifeforms that can take the form of giant robots. The robots are played OK but how hard is it to really voice iconic characters like this. Also a waste of time was the final battle scene between Optimus Prime and Megatron, lasting maybe 30 seconds.The only character who gave me any enjoyment was Agent Simmons played by John Turturro, who is trying to at least have fun with his character, damn I wanted to movie to be about him every time he is on screen. The problem here is none of the characters are given enough time to really develop and give us a reason to care about what they are doing, scenes with the human characters go nowhere fast and they feel like you are watching a 2 hour long trailer for the movie.
Setting: 5/10
I know that this is called setting but I also think that his includes the visuals of the movie and Michael Bay does no a thing or two about visuals. The movie itself and the visual effects are really done well and you do get a decent picture painted. That being said again this is all a retread of the past two movies and thus its no longer special is it. Yeah we have the robots but we have already seen that give us something exciting now but alas we are given the same formula and of course we are all going to eat it up. I am not immune to this I feel for it with the Star Wars prequels each time hoping that the last film wasn't just that one bad film in the series. You know watching robots kill each other isn't a hard concept to do and for the most part in the last two films Michael Bay has gotten that down, except now he knows that he doesn't have to try.
Dialogue: 1/10
Some of the lines in this moving seem more like what you would expect from a professional wrestling show that you find in the backyard of your cousins friends house, or that episode of South Park who did the same thing. I guess its not so much that because the characters are boring that the dialogue is not tolerable but its the fact that the characters haven't been given a chance to develop to make what they are saying even mean anything. This also brings me to the other thing that drives me crazy about Michael Bay. Michael Bay loves America and that I have no problem with, but his movies are all about Freedom and why America kicks ass. Every time Optimus gives a little speech its about freedom and how tyranny will never be allowed on his watch. Dear lord by the time I was done with this movie I was sick of freedom. Also of course these scenes are done with an American flag in the background to drive the point home. You get the feeling that the lines are meant to make us think of the war on terror and most of us are trying to put that behind us.
Overall: 2/10- EPIC FAIL
This movie was everything I thought it was going to be and less. Michael Bay has said that this is his last movie in the series and we can only hope that means that we never have to see this crap again. This isn't even bad anymore its really sad that this movie is going to get the money that its getting because like myself with the Star Wars prequels sad fan boys will rationalize that because it's Transformers it deserves there hard earned cash. The only think I liked at the end of the day was that I did not pay for this pop culture abortion.
Very well put. From an honest review, this is exactly what it was, using your formula deviated from many others previous. But I enjoyed it only in the sense that he did what he accomplished, make it look flashy and badass. I can say that the CG in this film was breathtaking, BUT the film as a movie sucked. I have always liked the Transformers but there was more to them than just flashy awesomeness.
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